The Good: “Wu-Tang” by U-God featuring Method Man.
Let’s keep it real. In the history of mankind, nobody has ever fast-forwarded through a Wu-Tang song in eager hopes of hearing U-God drop a dope 16. If the Clan really is like the New York Yankees, as depicted on that old XXL cover, then Golden Arms is more like the Ramiro Pena to Ghostface‘s “Rap Derek Jeter.” But this “Wu-Tang” video was just a reminder that U-God pulled out a timely double in the bottom of the ninth with his Dopium album. You don’t normally expect a chopped and screwed chorus and a blaxploitation-style beat (love the organs) to be a winning combination, but somehow it worked. Applaud U-God. The last time I paid attention to one of his verses, Melyssa Ford was getting out of the pool in that “Cherchez La Ghost” video. And if you didn’t do so already, get up off your cheap ass and give this man 10 bucks…Dopium is an album worth buying.
The Bad: “Shots” by LMFAO featuring Lil Jon
Damn, damn, damn Lil Jon. What the peanut butter and jelly is this bullshit? Even after that “Give It All U Got” trash, I was still holding out hope, because “Bia Bia” and the YoungBloodZ “Damn” still cause people to get duffed out in clubs to this day. I’m all in favor of taking “Shots,” be they Patron Silver or the kind best applied to a drunk broad at the club with a dumb tattoo over her lower back. But I can’t co-sign this shit. These LMFAO dudes look like some fucking Muppets. And no matter how much I like a chick grinding up against me while some ignorance is playing in the background, I’ll either be ordering more drinks or going to take a piss when this comes on in the club.
The Ugly: “DeePeeGee” by Tha Dogg Pound
Fact: We’re in a recession. But that said, two dudes lip-synch rapping in front of a webcam and smoking weed does not a video make. Daz has all kinds of platinum plaques in the room. I know he’s still sitting on some of that settlement money from when he sued Suge. They could’ve at least sprung for the Macbook Pro and got this shit to show up clear like a decent iChat session. The crazy part is that this is actually a pretty dope song. Daz comes right with the beat, and Kurupt is as coherent as he was on Blaqkout if not more so. But this shit is extra blurry, and it just makes me miss the good old days when Snoop was kicking over New York skyscrapers with his Chuck Taylor‘s.
I fucking hate Twitter, but Malice said it best. “My Grandma is turnin over in her grave right now!!!!! ‘Da hell is dis mess!’ (Grandma’s voice but cover ur teeth w ur lips)…Two nigg@s, a plate of chicken, and sunshine glowing behind it. SMH.” Aside from the flyer Malice mentioned, there’s also the fact that the whole crew is posted up outside of Obama Fried Chicken in Brownsville (skip ahead to the 25 second mark). I love the Clipse as much as anyone else. And Rik Cordero has been killing it with the videos. But I just don’t get all the damn chicken references for a song that only mentioned eating poultry at a particular fast food spot during the hook. It’s bad enough I have to watch that fake ass Cajun broad when the real commercials come on. They could’ve recreated that scene in King of New York when Fishburne has the shootout (I know that was at a KFC, but still). Instead, I’m reliving the plot of Undercover Brother.