Greetings Hip Hop heads, hustlers, haters and everyone in between. As if you didn’t already know what time it was. The good ol’ boys and girls on the HipHopDX staff have once again joined forces like Voltron to deliver another edition of everyone’s favorite column…”What The Fuck”! With everything going on in the industry, it was difficult narrowing down the biggest WTF moments of the last couple of months. But we got it together and we know you want it. This edition includes everything from Weezy Vs Hov and T.I. “owning” Tony Yayo down to some real questionable acts from your favorite tough guy rappers. So go ahead and get your “first” comments ready (WTF is the meaning of that shit anyway?), buckle up and enjoy the ride. I’ll be expecting some great love/hate mail.
1.WTF were you thinking 50?
2. WTF 50? Awwwwwwww maaaaaaaan! *speechless*
3. WTF kind of other homo erotic message is 50 Cent sending in the “Amusement Park” video? That lil’ wiggling dance he does just doesn’t make him very much of a tough guy. Man, 50 is having a bad month aside from all that cheese he just made off of Vitamin Water. I guess he still wins in the end.
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4. WTF is Lil Wayne thinking? An online reality show where the reward is a deal with Cash Money? What if the dude they pick isn’t a good kisser?
5. WTF…does Wayne really want it with Hov? Apparently everyone wants a piece of the old man these days. Holla at me when Hov gets another Nas-like “Ether” threat though.
6. WTF is up with Lil’ Wayne being considered one of the best to rock a mic? Rank him next to Rakim, Biggie, KRS-1, Pac and Big Pun? Weezy F. Baby? Hot guest spots? Yeah. GOAT? Hell nah…”we don’t believe you, you need more people!” © Jay-Z
7. WTF happened to Juelz Santana? He should be where Lil Wayne is now. He can thank Jimmy and Cam’s beef with Jay for being pushed to the back of the line.
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8. WTF Yayo? YOU GOT OWNED!
9. WTF was T.I. thinking when he socked Luda’s manager in the face? Does he REALLY want it with Luda?
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10. WTF was with T.I. blaming T.I.P. for punching him? Think Luda is buying it? Didn’t think so…
11. WTF is wrong with R. Kelly? “Real Talk” yo? Look…the dude sings “Fuck Me? Nah…Fuck You!” and other wonderful lines like “Bitch I wish you wooooooould burn my muthafuckin clothes!” Makes “Trapped In The Closet” sound like “Overjoyed” © Phonte
12. WTF is wrong with yall for almost making R. Kelly gold in the 1st week? It’s like we are saying “Kelz…its okay to sing about bullshit (animal sex, rockets going up Uranus, random rambling), we’ll keep buying!” And y’all wanna know what’s wrong with music today *sigh*.
13. Really, WTF is up with artists who know they’re pushing the line of decency? If R. Kelly can comeback with “I’m a Flirt” can’t Michael Jackson do a song like “Touch You” at this point as long as the instrumental is tight?
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14. WTF is going on with the R. Kelly trial anyway? That girl must be 30 by now.
15. WTF is up with a hit song called “Wipe Me Down?” No disrespect to anyone but those three words together sound like a gay dude’s anthem (which is fine if you’re into that) unless Trina or Eve is on there.
16. WTF is up with T-Pain talking about Ray-J‘s “meat?” Somebody needs to take that part of the game back…
17. WTF is up with Akon grinding a hole in that poor 14-year-old on stage (her young ass shouldn’t have been in the damn club anyway!)…
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…and then following it up with launching another kid off the stage and into the crowd at another show?
I ain’t fuckin with an Akon show…shit is way too interactive!
18. WTF was up with Cam’ron reporting live & direct from his timeshare in his boxers? You can’t diss anybody in some daisy dukes!
19. WTF is Foxy Brown doing with a pimp and getting her wig pushed back by some hookers? I thought if you were on probation you couldn’t hang out with the “seedy” type.
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20. WTF is wrong with DJ Khaled? No one gave his ass permission to be that ignorant and stupid. To use the N word? To yell like a moron? And why the hell are all these rappers co signing his ass? Dude didn’t even produce much of his own album. WTF DID HE ACTUALLY DO?
21. WTF is taking Saigon’s album so long to drop?
22. WTF kind of world do we live in when Paris Hilton going to jail is all over the news while Mumia Abu Jamal’s life or death case doesn’t even get a scrolling marquee on the bottom of newscasts?
At least Mika Brzezinski of MSNBC knows bullshit when she sees it…
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23. WTF is with wrestler Chris Benoit offing his wife and his son and then hanging himself??? Word is that he used the Crippler Crossface (trademark wrestling move) to strangle his son! Dude had major problems.
And they say rappers are crazy…
24. WTF is up with the Shop Boyz‘ “Party Like A Rock Star” and Huey‘s “Pop Lock and Drop It” getting airplay every 20 minutes on the radio along with regular rotation in my 24-Hour Fitness gym but the records can’t even crack the top 10? Does this mean payola in the hip-hop biz is over?
25. WTF is Game doing right now? Does anyone miss him? Anyone?
There you have it gotdammit! Agree with us if you want. Diss us if you dare. We don’t give a fuck! We all got some E-Thuggin in us these days right?
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Give a shout to your favorite gotdamn Editor-In-Chief on my myspace page…
We now return you to your regularly brainwashed lives,
Management
