The You People star opened up in an emotional Instagram post on Friday (March 31) about how she dreads the date when Hussle was murdered in front of his Marathon Clothing store in 2019.
“I hold my breath all of March knowing I have to face the memory of the day you transitioned….Holding on to ancient wisdom but the pain is the pain and nothing was ever the same…Eternal Being Ermias Asghedom I Love You,” she penned.
London then quoted a sacred text from Bahá’í, writing: “To consider that after the death of the body the spirit perishes is like imagining that a bird in a cage will be destroyed if the cage is broken, though the bird has nothing to fear from the destruction of the cage. Our body is like the cage, and the spirit is like the bird.”
London continued: “We see that without the cage this bird flies in the world of sleep; therefore, if the cage becomes broken, the bird will continue and exist. Its feelings will be even more powerful, its perceptions greater, and its happiness increased.
“In truth, from hell it reaches a paradise of delights because for the thankful birds there is no paradise greater than freedom.'”
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Nipsey Hussle’s killer, Eric Holder Jr., was sentenced to 60 years to life in prison by a Los Angeles judge in February, eight months after being convicted for gunning down the rapper.
Holder, 33, was allegedly angered by Nipsey accusing him of being a snitch during a brief conversation outside his South L.A. clothing store. He returned moments later with a pair of weapons and unloaded at least 10 shots into the Crenshaw rapper, fatally wounding him.
Nipsey and Lauren London share a six-year-old son together named Kross, who was born in 2016, roughly three years after the couple started dating.
“I also don’t want to give a misconception that I’m at peace and I’m walking around on a cloud,” London told PEOPLE earlier this year while reflecting on her partner’s death.
“I have to wake up with the intention of this every day because there are days I don’t want to, and I’m like angry about it. And that’s what healing is. It is up and down, side to side, all over the place. You know what I mean? And with each new level, there’s something else.”
Meanwhile, a new posthumous Nipsey Hussle verse landed on DJ Drama’sI’m Really Like That album, which debuted on streaming services on Friday.
The late rapper appears on “Raised Different” alongside Jeezy and Blxst. However, fans of the Victory Lap rhymer might recognize his verse from the Mike & Keys-produced “State of Mind,” which was released in 2016 as part of Nip’s Marathon Mondays series.