For his second consecutive birthday, Big Sean delivered an introspective and vulnerable update on his mental well-being via Instagram.

On Monday (March 26), the rap superstar admitted not feeling like himself since his birthday last year and couldn’t figure out why.

“Somewhere in the middle of it, dawg I just felt … lost,” he lamented.

The Grammy-nominated rapper revealed he had been meditating since he was 17-years-old to help when his energy was “off,” prompting him to eventually seek the help of therapists to gain clarity. He also expressed how his relationships suffered through depression.

“I had like a lot of toxic relationships around me, even the relationship with my mom was like getting to a point where we wasn’t talking like that, and it was just weird, you know, because that never been like that with me and her,” he admitted.

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my thoughts (2/3) 🗣 CLARITY

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Sean was noticeably absent from the 2018 album front, which followed a prolific 2017 when he released Double or Nothing alongside Metro Boomin and his fourth studio album, I Decided. But instead of attributing blame elsewhere, he looked at the man in the mirror.

“I realized that it all started with me and I had to analyze myself, I couldn’t point the finger at anybody else, had to point it at myself, and you know nurture the relationships that were important to me, but most important nurture the relationship with myself,” he continued. I just wanted to speak on it and share you know because a lot of y’all need insight like I do, and probably felt similar too.”

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my thoughts (3/3) 🗣 UNCONDITIONAL LOVE

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After seeing the light at the end of the tunnel, Sean Don further detailed how doing activities solo helped him discover himself anew.

“I started getting back to making music, it started to be fun again, I am making the best music of my life.”

He concluded is positive Instagram manifesto: “It feels good to be back on a higher level.”