*This Just In*….
The HipHopDX crew is at it again after yet another (un)eventful month that yielded many What The Fuck’s out of us. We got embarrassed by women shitting on the floor, women sexing up Flava Flav and Screech, men dressing up like women frying up chicken and finally men acting like bitches. Oh yeah…let’s not forget how remedial Hip Hop has become. So enjoy, get your head tilted and say it with us… WHAT THE FUCK!?!?!?
1. WTF… I mean What In The Bloody Fuck is this!?!?!?
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“Fry That Chicken”
2. WTF! Are they just letting anyone rap?
3. WTF ever happened to originality? How many songs do we have to release about snapping fingers? No, you don’t have to talk about the war, the environment or your personal life, but do you really have to describe a dance in every song you have?
4. WTF was up with this Diddy/50 “beef”? How do you battle someone who can’t write their own rhymes?
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5. WTF did Game think when he got a butterfly tatted on his face? Well, I guess he figured out it wasn’t the smartest move. But, to go and place a huge LA on top of it just adds to the WTF factor. Guess he had a “change of heart” on that butterfly.
6. WTF is wrong with Game? Can the man answer a damn question without peppering it with bullshit, or you know, just straight up lying. If Dre ain’t give you no beats then just say so motherfucker. “Uh buy the album and find out.” Riiiiiight.
7. WTF is up with this Game and Ras Kass beef? Game is like 6’3″ and Ras is like Lucky Charm sized. It’s like punching out your baby brother. Is Father Snoop going to have to sit these two down to explain West Coast Unity?
8. WTF is wrong with Ras Kass? Didn’t anyone teach him how to bob and weave in the pen?
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9. WTF? Back in the day, you used to say wack MCs made nursery rhymes. Young Joc and that “Chain Hang Low” guy took it literally and they banked off it. So, WTF is wrong with the people who purchased these things? I KNOW YOU SEE IT!
10. WTF? The illest MC to drop this month did not glorify violence, sex or huge rims and ice? What’s going on here Lupe? (Sarcasm)
11. WTF is up with Young Joc or his ghostwriter (if that’s the case). “Eeny, Meeny, Miney, Mo” in your rhymes is not the way to show your versatility or intelligence. Sure, he says he won’t be lyrical in order to make money, but do you have to rap like a kindergartener to do so?
12. WTF is up with this industry when all the top selling rappers lyrics are either nursery rhymes or describing corny ass dances? And you wonder why there are so many rappers today? They see that nonsense and go “Hey…I can do that!”
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13. WTF is it when UPN (U Pick a N*gga) and WB (remember that minstrel show frog?) merge together and the new station is called the CW? Is it just me or the first word I thought of when I saw the “C” was Colored!
14. WTF is Bobby and Whitney‘s problem? I thought the crack pipe that binds would be enough to keep them together?
15. WTF is with footwear at the beach? First Cam and now DMX rag on Jay-Z for wearing flip flops on vacation? Who the fuck cares?? Wearing flip flops is bitch but complaining about another man’s footwear is the pinnacle of manliness? These motherfuckers need hobbies…
16. WTF? Jay-Z‘s back? Guess he has to start earnin’ for “chinchilla coat” and the wedding ring he’s about to pay for. Or maybe he just has to save Roc-A-Fella…again.
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17. WTF is Nas thinking right now? His album was supposed to drop in November and here comes Jay-Z (his former nemesis) putting Nas on the shelf for his own album. And you wonder who really won the battle…
18. WTF is this 1990? Bobby Brown on the cover of Vibe, Janet on the cover of damn near everything else…when is the new Bel Biv Devoe album dropping?
19. WTF? Is anybody else losing sleep cuz they addicted to youtube and myspace?
20. WTF is wrong with Flavor Flav and this Flavor of Love nonsense? A lot… but we tune in. So, WTF is wrong with the viewing public?
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21. WTF!?!? If a chick shits on the floor and I get kicked out the house by Flav before she does then I must jump in front of the nearest truck and kill myself. My self esteem has been shot to hell.
22. WTF is going on when Flava Flav bangs every chick on Flava of Love (please tell me you heard New York tell Flav “That shit is proper” when he was blowing her back out) and gives Bootz the boot (all puns intended) for not giving it up and having some morals? Women…you gotta fight this sexism shit. But to all you skeezers out there “ U Wonder Why They Call You Bitch” © Tupac.
23. WTF is wrong with the world when you find out that Saved By The Bell’s Screech (Dustin Diamond) has a gotdamn sex tape out! What’s worse is that he is having a threesome and reportedly gives one chick a “dirty sanchez” (look it up). If Flava Flav and Screech can get booty…what’s wrong with the rest of us men??? No…what’s wrong with you women!?!?!
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24. WTF is wrong with you? Yes, you readers (n/a to all of course). A couple weeks ago we reach out to two grown men beefing over some bullshit (read: Open Letter to the Game, Ras Kass and the Hip Hop Community) to do our part in keeping this shit from escalating and some of yall actually call us bitches for it. Are you motherfuckers really that poisoned? I don’t care how cool the industry makes these thugs look, you need to think for yourself and wake the fuck up. If promoting peace over violence has become a point of ridicule than this fucking world is even worse shape than I thought. Oh, and if you were one of the junior thugs that called us out for that, fuck you, from the bottom of my heart. (A personal WTF from J-23)
25. WTF is up with Black Culture? Shiiiit…if “Laffy Taffy” set us 50 years back, “Chain Hang Low” set us 100 years back and “Fry That Chicken” set us 400 years back, how much more fucking up do we have to do before we go back to being kings and queens again?
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Well there it is gotdammit. Agree with us if you want. Diss us if you dare. We don’t give a fuck!
Thanks and back to your regularly scheduled brainwashed lives,
Management
